“Sir?”

I was going to write this a while ago, but I kind of forgot about it until I was reminded, like, yesterday or a few days ago. For the past several months (well, with some intervals, hence my forgetting) people have been addressing me as “sir”. And I’m not just talking about customer service formality. I’m talking about just everyday people on the street who want to ask me a question. Like, “Excuse me, sir. Do you know what time it is?” Or “Excuse me, sir. Are you using this chair?’”

Granted, these people are younger than me, but it’s just, I don’t really look at myself as someone who should be called “sir”. I prefer to talk to people on an equal level. To see people as people. I’m not comfortable with the idea of being put at some status that is above others.

On a similar note (or maybe because of this note), I’ve been considering what I might want my students to call me when I become a teacher. You know, like, by my first name or Mr. + last name.

When I taught in Japan, I felt too young to be called Mr. so and so. Plus there was the problem of pronouncing my last name. It would have sounded like “I Shi-to”. Or in Taiwan, “I shi-ta” both of which sound uncomfortably close to “I shit.”

There won’t be this pronunciation problem in America, but I’m still not sure what I’d prefer. If I insist to be called by my first name, it might seem I’m refusing to acknowledge that I’m older and in a position of authority. It might also seem like I’m trying to be cool allowing my students to call me by my first name. On the other hand, if I insist to be called Mr. last name, then it might seem I’m demanding that the students acknowledge my position of authority, or that I might be demanding respect.

I’ve noticed that people who demand respect simply because of their status or position generally don’t get it. But I’ve also noticed (when I was a student) that I was never comfortable calling my teachers by their first name, especially (and perhaps ironically) the older I got and the closer in age I got to my instructors (like in college). They wanted to acknowledge that college students were adults, but I wanted to acknowledge a separation between instructor and student.

Well, I don’t know. I think the answer is already clear to me. In fact I’ve pretty much already decided to leave it to the students to decide what to call me.

Hmm…this post kind of went in a different direction than I had initially planned. I was going to tie this concept of being called sir when I didn’t want or expect to with the general irony of being on the other side of what you want.

Or, that’s the way I put it. I think most others put it as "what you want is always on the other side". I think I had meant to write a post about that concept and how to deal with it. Although I think I did a bit when I wrote a proposal for an alternative marriage.

But I was also just thinking about how it seems I’m passively being put in a different place in my life. I’ve described it to others as being pushed up the ladder instead of climbing the ladder. It’s just, um…It’s just very counter to what I ranted about in Season 2 with being active instead of passive. But that was back when I thought I was in control of things. Everything has changed now. I’m tired of fighting the way I did then. And really, why fight in this case if by being passive, I’m still being pushed up to a higher energy state?

Hmm…let me find that post that I wrote…Ah, here it is.

Ok, yeah… Wow… Ok, I have to say, I never wanted to re-post this… But, anyway, yeah, I guess I had come to these conclusions before.

Well that’s probably enough to write for this post.